Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
