On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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