Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize