David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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