So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
