you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
