Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
