Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
