just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
