I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
one two three fourrrrnication!
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
