dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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