Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Randomize
