His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
