Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
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