you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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