im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
