im drinking this country out of the recession.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
