Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
