Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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