I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Randomize
