Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
