But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Randomize
