There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
We are all done wearing pants today
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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