I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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