VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
