Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
there's paper in my vomit.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
