just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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