Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
