how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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