have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
