We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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