Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
