I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
