Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Randomize
