She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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