I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
