i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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