I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
