Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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