this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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