Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
