just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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