I'm drive I can fine osifer
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
