I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
