? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
