Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
