so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
ugly people sure do ruin things
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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