im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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