Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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