Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(631): View more from New York

our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college

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(661): View more from California

this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.

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(256): View more from Alabama

I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.

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(253): View more from Washington

The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.

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(818): View more from California

Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.

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(317): View more from Indiana

You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????

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